Saturday, August 4, 2012

Bury my Head with The Bog

I've had just a horrible week and I just want to bury my head in bed and lay with Bog the Basset.  He gets it, atleast that is what he told me.

Dealing with stress and the band for the first time was interesting. 

I clearly saw the path I take when I'm stressed out.   I ate like total and complete shit this week, made horrible choices.   I'm not going to even list the shit I ate and attempted to eat its embarrasing.

What caused this stress?   A sudden break in my routine and financial issues.   

#1 You all know I'm a workout and spinning freak, a control freak and very routine.   When my routine gets messed with I can become very difficult!    I went to spin class on Tuesday night just like normal, but Wednesday 8/1, I was given news that my gym just closed it doors.     This just drove me bat shit crazy for 3 days, because I need to exercise to continue forward with my weight loss goals.     Then, of all the days, yesterday I get up at 4:30 am drive to my PT session with Mark that starts at 5:30 am ......tick tock...tick tock NO SHOW.    Damn it!      I'm not mad because he forgot me, that is expected to happen at some point, but the timing of him "forgetting me" was AWFUL!   Ofcourse, I started to immediately think, well now he is gone...just give me a plate of biscuits and gravy and lets call this SHIT WHAT IT IS..... GAME OVER.  

PANIC MODE until I got a text message which stated "i'm an idiot, tomorrow 5:30 am?"   

Between these two incidents this week, I have just gone completely over the deep end with my food choices, I just cannot cope.

#2 Financial.    I am not sure what else could come due for me to pay in 6 weeks lets make a list:     quarterly car insurance due 8/1, medical bills from my surgery due now, annual car tags due 9/1, a medical bill for Buns shows up for $107 from a service dated July 2011...okay? $225 electric bill (its hott as balls this Summer); annual heartworm test & meds for 2 of my 4 dogs..which this routine exam resulted in the Vet telling us that Roscoe must have his teeth cleaned ASAP, and have an absess removed that was very painful for him, my neice was in town and I always spoil her and finally a trip home to visit friends and family.

Listen this bitch has a good job and makes some $$$$$, but for the love of God I'm not Rich by any means.   This was just WAY WAY TOO MUCH for us to take on in a 4 week period.   So stressed!


Ok, so the good news is:    I'm broke, but everything is PAID.   I signed up for a new gym last night and it is really nice.    They have spin classes and a few of my workout friends from my prior gym have also signed up for a membership as well.    So, hopefully seeing some familiar faces from time to time, will help me with this change in routine.

www.lafitness.com

LA FITNESS



I've got boot camp today with Mark at 10:30 am and then we are getting together 3X next week (mon/wed/fri)..., plus I'm going to spin class tomorrow morning and again next week.

So i'm praying that the fat devil will show some mercy on me when I get on the scale next Friday morning.    If he doesn't you all will be the first to know.


16 comments:

  1. Eeeeek. That's a lot for anyone to deal with. Good job getting your exercise plan sorted again straight away.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I am like you, that when my routine gets derailed, it can really put me in a tizzy. But can I say I am SO IMPRESSED that you took action on it so quickly. Although you are upset at the eating you did, you already have joined a new gym, you paid all these bills, you have HANDLED IT! - wow. I think you should be very proud of yourself. You did not let these situations keep you derailed.

    Maybe once you are in a less stressed place, think about any "non-food" rewards you might add to the comfort list for next time? They might not totally replace the stress eating, but they might start to be traded in as coping tools? (I had an Eating Disorders Therapist hand me a list of "non food rewards" once, and I did the biggest eye roll ever....but it has helped me...).

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I could have put this off, but really felt that the longer I did the more of "new routine" might strike and I did not want to do that. This new gym though my god there is like a million people there. I swear its like a bar at midnight. I was shocked!

      Delete
  3. sometimes a little puppy spooning makes everything better. Only 1 of my 3 will really snuggle with me. The other two tolerate it for a minute, and then scoot away, but my snugglebug is the best. Glad you're headed back in the right direction!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Amy this dog will lay in bed like this for hours. We let him get in bed every Saturday morning like around 5:30 as a treat and boy does he suck it up. He also knows when it is Saturday because any other day of the week he doesn't even bother us. Wierd.

      Delete
  4. That is ALOT to deal with...but it sounds like you got it all done. I am the same way - without a routine, I get all frazzled. This week, bcs we had to buy a new car, I never got to my yoga class on Tuesday, and by the time everything was organized with the financing, etc, I was like 'screw it! I'll do it next week!' Also, I wanted to drive our new lovely car to work, so not so much with the biking to work this week either! Ah well, next week, back at it...I'm sure you will be FINE. And good for you for handling it!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I used to do yoga actually loved it. Not sure why I stopped? hmmmm

      Delete
  5. I would be curious to know a few coping tools.... I am feeling much better today!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh I'm so relieved! I was kind of regretting my comment later, because I was afraid I made the "typical guy mistake" of offering an advicey response, instead of just a listening ear. My general rule is don't offer a friend advice unless there is a direct question!! Like I said, when I was handed a "List" the first time, I was not impressed, lol. :-) I think probably most all of us who have struggled for YEARS with weight issues, have had SO MUCH ADVICE!

      Basically, however, it was just a long list of ideas of things a person might find pleasurable that had nothing to do with food, ie: take a bath, read a book, take a walk, cuddle with the dog, call a friend, listen to music, color a picture, do yoga, get a pedicure, etc etc. The idea is to make your own list of things you can do that bring you the pleasure/comfort/indulgence/stress release, the food is giving you, that you can go to instead of reaching for food. We often grab the food because it is a habit, and so convenient. Some comfort substitutes (alcohol, shopping) are not ideal either because they are addictive or costly, but that still leaves a lot! (Not that you can't ever grab a drink, or buy a new outfit, but you know what I mean.)

      For me, a lot of my eating is emotional, so it is extremely helpful to try to replace it with something else. A second replacement I do, is if I have to grab food to cope, choose a "less damaging" food, like a Jamba Juice smoothie instead of a combo meal. If I just have to have a certain craving though, it's better to have it and be done with it.

      I am so glad you are feeling better, and I stand in awe of your exercise schedule!

      Delete
  6. Hey girl-- give yourself a break and then just move on from the 'bad' choices... we all make mistakes and then we can also say to ourselves: "No guilt, just move on and do your very best from here."
    You're doing great...
    :-)

    ReplyDelete
  7. way to go getting right on that new gym! and ughh I hate when all the sudden there is a month were it seems as though every bill under the sun is due on top of random shit like car costs, pet costs, or my fav, an emergency dental visit that usually ends in a few thousand dollar bill for a root canal or some shit..... move forward babe, the shits all paid, the food is all digested (i hope) and you have a new gym..oh and you have a snuggly doggie to make you feel better :o)

    ReplyDelete
  8. Wow. You rock for not having all the crazy stop you from moving forward! Just keep plugging away.

    ReplyDelete
  9. We all trip occasionally! You can do this!

    ReplyDelete
  10. So proud of you for not letting all of this ruin everything you have worked so hard for!!! So what you ate bad for a bit...it's over...it's done with, today is a new day! :)

    ReplyDelete
  11. Sorry you had a rough week!! That is a lot to handle, especially all at once. Thankfully we are onto another week and a fresh start right?!?

    ReplyDelete